Gossip is a problem in any community, but gossip is much worse in a small community. People who lived in a small town or a village are likely to have felt there were times when people in the community knew more about their personal lives than they knew about their own lives. The queer community is small, so gossip can be a significant problem. Destructive gossip can end friendships.

There is nothing wrong with talking about friends and acquaintances, as long as what we say does not destroy reputations or cut people down. When we talk with friends in our kitchens, or in coffee shops and bars, we need to be careful that we only share things about people that we know are true and that do not harm reputations. Probably the best policy is to never say anything behind a person's back you would not be prepared to say to the person's face, and to not say things that are not painful to hear.