Some gay, lesbian, bisexual, and trans-identified Christians are left feeling uncomfortable with texts that tell us how we should respect and treat our parents. Not all parents have treasured the heaveny gift of queer children. In fact, some parents have abused, rejected, or kicked out their queer children. How can we think of bringing joy to an abusive father? How can we think of respecting and cherishing a mother who is emotionally and spiritually abusive?

Many people have men and women in our lives who have played the role of grandparents, parents, brothers, sisters, sons, daughters, or more extended family. We can bring joy to those people who have been dad's at times during our lives. We can also love and cherish the women in our lives who mothered us. When we do that, God will consider us to have brought joy to our father, to have loved and cherished our mother.